My situation

So there I was...

I logged off of Eve, as I've been getting considerably burned out lately, trying to keep a corp running and productive on my own. I still manage to log in every day, but after an hour I just need some first person shooters. I left vent on, though, and I heard our former CEO (I'm acting as CEO now) talking with someone else I hadn't heard from in very long. Cool. I logged off of my shooter and back into Eve and started chatting with them.

Some background: Things haven't been going extremely well within our corp, at least in my opinion. Others may kid themselves, but our move to 0.0 space has broken us up a bit. In November, my coworkers started playing Eve again, and in December, I rejoined them. We all wanted the same thing, we wanted a bigger corp, and we wanted 0.0, and everything that came with it. I had other friends from back home who had a corp of moderate size and they were looking to get into 0.0 as well, so it seemed a perfect fit.

We joined and I began to get involved immediately. I knew what the 3 of us wanted, and I meant to get it. Since these were already friends of mine, I didn't have to get used to them, it was full bore from the start. I am a very strong personality, love it or hate it, or tolerate it, it's who I am. I know what I want and have my own idea on how to get there, right or wrong, I'll decide. I'm open to others opinions, but when I know something won't work, I'll tell you, and it's not usually the nicest way.

So these guys all basically bought their toons, and I had the most experience out of all of them, starting in 2006 and having been in a 0.0 alliance for over a year. I knew what we needed, how to get there, and I began slowly taking the initiative. That got me the pvp director position. From there I steered us away from becoming a CVA pet (phew) and toward another option, our own alliance with some corps we all knew.

I never fully was into it, but it was the best option at the time for us. We uprooted and moved and wasted a month with this other corp (the third went with IT) and never got anywhere. I finally pushed again for us to go our own way and just find an alliance in 0.0 already and join that. We did.

Have you ever pulled teeth? Try pulling a carebear from his safe rocks in high sec. We weren't a huge corp, 50'ish members, and most of us had multiple accounts, so maybe 18 to 25 actual people. In my mind, we had to move everyone, we wouldn't survive as a corp with people sprinkled all over in high sec and in 0.0, so I made a compromise: we'd move 5 of our best pvp'ers out to 0.0, get things ready, and then move the rest up when we could train them and show them how safe it was.

For the first few days, 5 of us got into some fleets, a CTA started and for the first few fleets of that, we had the best turnout in our Alliance. Then it all fell apart. Before the CTA even ended, we went from 5 pvp'ers to 3, to just me. No one was ever online anymore, and when they were, it was to change skills or to sit in station.

I was the only director playing at that point, and I had to take charge of the corp, get our assets set up and represent us in pvp, because with the requirements of the alliance, we'd get kicked out if I didn't.

All of these guys we had in corp who said they wanted to go to 0.0 and start pvp'ing or mining fat rocks and ratting, suddenly weren't around. Suddenly, they couldn't afford a cruiser, suddenly they didn't even get into Ventrilo.

So, the corp falling apart around me, I took over as CEO and began trying to salvage those members we do have left who participate. That is where I am today.

A guy from the old Alliance messages me. They've joined a friendly alliance and ask how we're doing, I lie. We chat a bit about fleets and how things are going, he tells me they're doing great up there now, finally. Of the three that were in charge of that corp, he was the most grounded, and he says the other two are really starting to come down to earth and are out there pvp'ing. That's cool, I never really wished ill on them anyway. Then it comes out, he offers me a place if I ever need one, they'd be happy to have a pvp'er like me. Yeah, whatever, I've got responsi... yeah, starting to actually sound good, who needs responsibility.

Well I don't take him up on it, but I tell him the real situation we're in, I'm doing great, personally, but the corp is kind of dying, so sometime in the future it might be a possibility. Where his corp was smaller and should have died off after we left, they're thriving, gaining members, and we're dying. Oh well.

So there it is, my corp burning around me, and an offer on the table to get involved with another corp who is active. I'm still not going to do it, I will put in my best effort here, which means more recruiting, less pvp'ing, and possibly getting tossed from our alliance for low participation. That's it, I have no wisdom to share, no point to make, just my situation right there.